Shattered

It is amazing how easily you shattered me

Yet how difficult putting myself back together has been

Some pieces don’t fit any more

Others feel like they are in the wrong place

There are no instructions

No guidelines

Just a thousands of jagged pieces of who I was

Each one cutting me as I grasp them tightly

They illicit no blood

Just tears

So many tears

My face hollow

My eyes red

Enduring what seems like an endless stream

You and me made these pieces over decades

I gave you the biggest pieces of me

You gave me back the smallest of you

I tried to make all the small pieces replace the large

Struggled to hold them all together

Each piece replaced a piece of me gone

Until the whole looked nothing like what it was

And with the slightest admission from you

I was scattered across the floor

So now, broken, I’m so unsure

What should my reflection even look like?

Where do the pieces go now?

Do I bother using the tiny shattered pieces you gave me?

Or try to piece back together the bigger ones I gave you?

In the end I cannot put these pieces back the same

So I will gather my broken remains

Then I’ll make something new

It’ll be imperfect

Crisscrossed by the telltale signs of a break

Scarred forever by the way you dropped me

But it will be me

Jumbled together as best I can

Never to give my pieces away again

Each piece coated by an armor of caution. Pain.

Lessons learned

You will not shatter me again

Nobody will