I see it in your eyes
That expectant horror of what I might say
Searching for meaningless words to mutter
Should I be candid and straightforward
I see in your body language
That unexpressed feeling
You wish I would just be ok
That you could just make it better
But you know the words are empty
You can’t truly offer hope
And so you don’t know what to say
When there is nothing to say
If I express my pain
I make it your awkward pain
So instead I grow a little angry inside
At the idea that I should be ok
That my world falling apart
On the day he died
Doesn’t mean it fails to spin for anyone else
So I smile and laugh
Though I feel shattered inside
Quieted candor
Silenced by social expectations
And by the knowledge of the truth
That in small ways
Nothing will ever be ok again
